Are New Year’s resolutions worth making when, according to statistics, between 80 and 90% of them will fail? You may have ample personal experience with the truth behind this statistic. We’re creatures of habit, and often many of those habits are bad. So we make plans and strive to do better again and again and again, only to add those twenty pounds we’ve dropped plus some, spend twice whatever debt we managed to pay off, and end the winter feeling more defeated than ever.
Facing yet another failed attempt, we decide we’re the problem. We’re simply not disciplined and committed enough. But what if we’re approaching this whole “quest for a better self” wrong? What if in our determination for change, we’re setting ourselves up for frustration?
Here are six steps that can help you think through your goals for the new year.
1. Begin with Prayer- In a desire to get fit, you determine, starting in January, to go to the gym at least three times a week. A great goal, right? Countless unexpected scenarios can derail our plans, but God knows what lies ahead and exactly what we are and aren’t capable of. Before jotting down your New Year’s Resolutions, take some time to seek God’s guidance. Ask Him if your goals are realistic and attainable.
2. Break Bigger Goals into Incremental Wins- Perhaps you want to lose fifty pounds. That can feel daunting to even the most enthusiastic and determined resolvers. A year without sugar will feel terribly long, and simply “eating better” is too vague. Most people can, however, go without anything for seven days, after which they can set another goal, and then another. Shorter goals (in duration and scope) will feel much more manageable and will allow for continual wins that will increase morale and thus make long-term change more likely.
3. Plan Rewards- In our grit-your-teeth and get ‘er done culture, many of us place incredibly high expectations on ourselves. We think we should be able to do something and stick with it, just because it’s the right thing to do. In a perfect world occupied by perfect humans, perhaps this is true; but most of us work best on incentives. When planning out your New Year’s resolutions and incremental wins, write out rewards for reaching each step. For example, when you pay off 10% of your credit card, meet a friend for coffee. When you lost ten pounds, buy yourself a pair of earrings or go on an afternoon outing.
4. Set Reminders- Many mornings, when reading my Bible, I feel convicted to grow in an area. I’ll be quick to listen and slow to speak (James 1:19), or spend more time in prayer (Romans 12:12), but so often I’ve completely forgotten my commitment by noon. To help with this, I’ve taped reminders to my mirror, the door leading to the garage, and have even been known to schedule relevant phrases into my online planner. This can be done for any goal; we’re pursuing character growth, increased knowledge, or better health.
5. Find, Meditate on, Memorize, and Recite a Relevant Verse- Interacting with Scripture is a powerful way to transform our thinking, which in turn transforms our behavior. God’s Word also has mysterious, supernatural power. In fact, of all our spiritual armor listed in Ephesians six verses ten through 17, the Bible, which is said to be the “sword of the Spirit,” is our only offensive weapon. God’s word is living and powerful (Heb. 4:12) and when recited, can help us demolish thoughts and desires contrary to God’s will for us. Jesus demonstrated how to use Scripture when tempted. When in the desert, whenever Satan came at Him, He fought back, successfully, by quoting Scripture. (Matthew 4:1-11).
6. Involve Jesus- Scripture tells us we have resurrecting power living within. Apart from Him, we can’t do anything of eternal value (John 15: 5). Our goal then should be to invite Him into our efforts and to lean hard on Him whenever we’re attempting to initiate change. The more we stay connected to Him through prayer, reading our Bibles, and quieting ourselves to hear His voice, the greater our strength to live abundant, self-disciplined lives. He wants us to thrive even more than we do, and He’s committed to walking beside us every step of our growth journeys.